Posts

Showing posts from October, 2018

Malibu Nights

Image
Assalamualaikum Taking a break from you makes me miss you. How do you know if someone means so much to you? And how do you know if you mean something to someone? How come you could mean everything to me, in this short time? What are those on your face? I see other people have the same concrete things. But why to me those of you seem so special? What kind of beauty do you own yourself? Everywhere I could try so hard searching for you. Your being makes me feel at ease. I run away just when my heart cracks, But something about me you should know; I would always come back to you. For another crack, Another laugh in between the abandonment. Another look from you, through the days and half evenings, Another time, With you. "I hope you'll never get tired of me," "I love you so very much, and you need to love me as much as well," Don't run away now. Please think hard and fix things with me.

You

Assalamualaikum Remember me? Remember those days we would laugh out loud, And I never knew you had beautiful pair of eyes, And such a nice smile. Remember when I told you your voice sounded distinct, And it's actually quite melodious, And I like it. Remember when we went out of town, You brought me to a place I'd never been, Wanted to explore more but I told you time was running short, We said goodbyes and that was the last. Hey, those days were the golden ones. I have always liked to have you around. And you have always been someone so amazing, Until now I tell my friends I am so proud of you. I like to be your friend. And will always like to be one.

Never Not

Image
Assalamualaikum "I'm okay, if they come to me only when they need, then it's okay," "If they feel like leaving me then it's also okay," "So you don't mind being others' second option?" Second option. Or maybe third. Or hundredth. I was okay if you did me that way. Come and go as you please, I could be your night candle at least. I was okay if you didn't think of me as often as I did, Of you. I'd cross your mind one day, Or if I never did, I did talk to you once and twice, Enough for you to know that I actually exist. If you ever needed me, just turn to your back, You'd find me there. As I had always been standing near you, Near enough but you didn't notice. Close enough, but you never actually feel I breathed. I thought I was okay being one of your options, At least sometimes you're going to choose me. But at that moment a friend asked me if I was really okay with it, My mind stopped fo

I Don't Want You Back

Image
Assalamualaikum Having you by my side, Yesterdays and months back then felt good. I could never live a day without you, Could never imagine how I'd be without you. But is this you saying goodbye? Do you really need me? Sometimes it felt like I was only in your dark nights. And your eyes finally rested on me only when they were in tears. When the sky became bright and the sun smiled for you, I could only see the back of your head, And only a few turns you made, but it changed nothing. I tried to chase your steps and when I did it, It changed nothing.  Do you need me? Would you still need me? When you reach the star you once wished for, When you're surrounded by the best people around,  When my existence slowly vanishes from your mind, When I no longer have what you need, Would you still need me? It hurts when you love the most. I keep telling myself I should have never let anyone in. But sometimes having someone make

Ni Yao De Ai

Image
Assalamualaikum It might be because I love you a little bit too much, I get sensitive so easily. As much as you hate yourself for being too complicated, I also hate the me who can't even figure herself out. I was in too much of denials. And I didn't even know why. It has always been I don't know. Or maybe, I didn't want to face the truth of myself. Again, I don't know :)

Life

Image
Assalamualaikum Each and every time I felt lonely, I thought it'd be good if I were me years back then. You probably didn't know me well before, But you'd notice me walking with at least someone by my side. I never hated the thought of me being alone. Not before I experienced it myself. Being alone made you feel sad. Even worse in a crowd where everyone would be with somebody, And then standing there, you felt like you're the only one by yourself. Deep down inside, I knew one day I had to be alone. One day I had to walk holding the hand of my own shadow. One day I had to accept the fact, Nobody was there for me. They said things happened and there was me, Life went on and there was me, Deciding to feel comfortable with no one's company. And I enjoyed it. Honestly, and truly. I had no one to wait for me, And I needed to wait for nobody. I was fine keeping up with my own pace. No need to catch up with someone else's speed. I was fine

You

Image
Assalamualaikum Most of the days I believed I was busy, So you didn't cross my mind. I believed I was complete, So you didn't come visit, Through those dreams and brief hallucinations, Most of the times I didn't see you anywhere near. Tomorrow was my weekend, You suddenly came. And my heart was filled by the feeling of loss, A minute later I longed for your existence. You danced through those long dreams and woke me up in tears. I like to be with you. I like to stay with you. I like to talk to you. I like to spend most of my time, with you. This is me saying I love you. So wait for me.

F4 - Creating Memories

Image
Assalamualaikum It's been weeks since the last I felt you around me. I'd like to see you once again, I'd like to see you in your jerseys, smiling while your face turns red. I'd like to hear your voice and the hilarious laugh that sounds nice. I'd like to remind myself how considerate you are, The way you help me with those glasses, The way you want to help me with those heavy work. I'd like to tell you how beautiful you are, And how hard it is for me to get you out of my mind.