ThirTeen

 Assalamualaikum It's been a while since my last writing.  I like the idea of vanishing into thin air; Where specific targeted people I hope would search for me.  And I hope for them to feel what it's like when I'm gone.  And I hope it's painful.  Sometimes I like to indulge in the feeling of being forgotten, Or left behind.  When I lay low in the bed alone, hoping for the time to tick faster, Just to feel your presence that I've always longed for. Thrice or more times I told you I am no longer your drive, And what it is there that keeps you from me.  I adore your commitment, but I need more time with you, from you.  So I always hope you'll listen to me for the rest of your life.  I can no longer eat spicy food.  I taught my brother to be stronger and that food is tasteless without its spices,  But now we both can no longer skip meals and love samyang.  All my life, Allah always gets me through everything.  Alhamdulillah life has always been good to me, when I&#

 Assalamualaikum I know many things from you. And from them, stemmed the other wonderful things I love.  I had always dreamed of the city you lived in.  Always wanted to discover the places you went to, And was always starstruck each time I heard the name of your city.  Because it had you in it. It had you in the arms, tight.  Now I live in the city you once were in. And the thought of you no longer crosses my mind so often like before.  But sometimes, listening to his voice reminds me of you.  And how you never really liked his new arts.  I think it's quite weird and funny, How you managed to make me cry like a fool in the train, Was it really love or just another escape infatuation?  Or you were just too kind and nice to me, That it felt like a dream came true if you were to accept me.  Now I'm so thankful to Allah that you never had it in you to hold my hands.  Because now I'm able to meet someone whose hands are perfect.  And whose whole being is just so breathtaking th