A - Stars in the Rain

 Assalamualaikum

It's been a year since I lost you.

They said if you were here, you would grow so handsomely,

And as a baby, you'd be too cute to handle.

It's not that I wanted to be the main character,

I guess, I just have to live with the pain.

Each time they show their happiness,

Wrapping those small little cuties in their sturdy and tired arms,

I pray that this is not envy,

But I couldn't help but whisper good for you.

And each time she shared her fair share of life stories,

While appreciating the warmth and trust she poured on to me,

My gut would feel suffocated, and in the early days my throat was dry, while my tired eyes were brimming with warm salted tears.

It's not easy.

It never is. 

I know people around have experienced loss at some point,

I'm not the only one.

But please validate my pain.

Please, I beg you. Let me be the main character.

So that I won't be crying when you are not blocked on my medias, while reminding me of my loss.

Allah's plan is the most perfect one.

I know and I believe in Him. 

I'm sorry, but I miss my precious baby boy.