Life

 Assalamualaikum

So hey, what's even up nowadays?

I'm sitting here, all alone in the house. With my beloved on my mind. 

It's been a while since the last I wrote something here.

Kuantan embracement is something else. 

It wasn't alien to me, neither was it near to me. 

All this while, Kuantan has always been a place for me to stay only for a few days. 

Bringing me to my favourite; ikan patin masak tempoyak, and the nice clothes which have always been affordable at parkson. 

But now the city has me in its palm. As always, I'm teaching myself to be tough. 

To be tough in the times of hardships, in the times it's the loneliness around. 

I have always enjoyed my own company, even when others judge it lonely. 

I like my time alone, bothering about nothing, doing whatever it is that I want, all on my own. 

I like to stay silent, I like to laugh alone while watching something funny. 

I like it. But to be alone is never a good thing. 

Even worst when you're feeling all sad and, lonely. 

It is, very lonely. 

I never thought growing up needs me to be away from my people.

I told my once-a-best-friend of mine, I wanted to live with her once we grew up.

But high school saw us drifting apart from each other. 

The recent reaching-out was nice and simple, but things between us have long changed,

And we couldn't bring out the old us back. 

But it's okay. I know that's how life is. 

Working here is good, alhamdulillah. The place is different. So are the people.

But they are all nice. But the void is still here. When I go home, when I'm in bed. 

When I drive to work, when I drift to buy groceries. 

I told myself it's okay, you need to toughen up little girl. 

It is okay. Alhamdulillah, for this life Ya Rabb. 

I have food on my table, I have good things around. 

And that's more than enough. Allah has blessed me with so many things. 

And I should always, zutto, be grateful for this life. 

So if you ask me how am I doing here, nowadays, 

Alhamdulillah I'm good. 

Thank you :)