Fin.

 Assalamualaikum

So I heard you got her hand for eternity.
Your whole being is anywhere but here,
And none of it still matters.

I never thought of you the same as before,
And it was long gone and we have moved on.
I have my handsome lover who is graceful and very much merciful,
But sometimes the haunting memories and hurting came back,
And sometimes, just like the old breeze in my younghood,
I wondered about you.

I never saw it as an unfinished bond.
I guess I had always wanted to start it and it was okay for me to leave it hanging.
And maybe you were never okay with it.
I was convinced you were actually pacing back and forth,
Between me and her. And I had always known you were in it with her.
And it wasn't me. 

I never did cry so hard for knowing it.
But maybe you need to know I was shattered by it.
Even though I saw the pictures of you and her,
Even though I knew what was going to happen. 

Do not get me wrong. I am happy with what I have now.
With what Allah has given me, it is actually more and more than enough.
And I wish you happiness and hope you will be happier than ever.

I have made my closure and it wasn't directed to you only.
And you have made your closure and I see it as a reality.

But what I had for you wasn't as simple as the breeze that passed by your sweet time.
And when you were brokenhearted I wasn't dancing with your friend.
It once mattered.

But not today, not anymore.
It was years back then.
So do not get me wrong.
This will be the finale of So# series.
They were only written to map you and her together. 






Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Daylight 2#

Image
Assalamualaikum You're the simpler version of creamy carbonara I've been craving for. Could never get tired of its expensive taste. And I can always find it any time at the back of my minimalist kitchen. The space for you, my spiced creamy carbonara, will always be there. Because I want it to.  You're the random people on the street.  In the crowds of beings on the land and in the sea. You stand and blend in, just like me.  But you got your own place in my heart. It sits in every beat, it rushed every single drop of adrenaline I sometimes subconsciously give in to,  From the first second I knew it's too late for me to run. You're the ordinary type of chocojar. But my all-time favourite callebaut. You're the usual face of peach strudles in the fridge, But forever my Kenny Hills' beautiful peach strudles I've been longing for. You're no actors or singers,  But you're the ultimate masterpiece in my eyes.  You got me running in a circle but now it
Read more

Say Don't Go

 Assalamualaikum Taking people for granted sometimes is meant with intentions. They can be pure, and sometimes regarded as remedial purity.  What about you, then? Fathoming love, I always thought was an easy thing to do. All my teenage years spent looking for one,  Blushed and flushed, both love and mad, I always thought my ribs were familiar with the word love and the meaning it brought by. But each night before bed, I wondered what it means to love and be loved? Then the topic of love languages came through. We all have different languages to express our love. What about you, then? What about you?
Read more

"Slut!"

 Assalamualaikum You're deserving of beautiful songs with sweet melodies, Scenting with roses and bits of peonies, Sweet and citrusy, Just like your favourite drink. In my other dream in another night, I felt suffocated as I missed your natural scent so much. And how much I regretted taking another path, Which no longer lead me to you.  I woke up feeling scared and at ease, As you were laying down next to me, Sleeping soundly and still dashingly looking.  You're a blessing sent by Him. And your whole being is everything I need.  And I want no other.  For all the late nights and early mornings, I could never thank you enough.  And no apology could ever make up for everything. You take me as I am. You see all the shameless flaws I'm owning up and never leave.  You make me feel loved, so much, despite my hideous sides I once scared to show.  You pamper me so much till I forgot how human you are, And how much you mean to me. Now I'm telling you I still like you a little bit
Read more