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Showing posts from July, 2018

Not Coming Back

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Assalamualaikum

I laughed.

Who am I to lie to her?

I knew I couldn't figure out myself, it might take me forever to be able to do so.
I could always change plans, change my mind in a second.
Today I'd tell you A, tomorrow it could always be another alphabets.
I didn't have solid stand, and I was okay with that.

I didn't think much about what to do next. I was a simple minded one.
I would follow what my heart told me to. And I could always go back and forth,
It's either me dancing or moon walking, it could be anything.

But I couldn't lie to myself.
In the end we both knew the truth. And had to live with it.

I thought it was okay. It was okay, if it stayed like that.
But it wasn't.

Who am I to lie to myself?

I'm sorry I've let you down. I'm sorry I keep on going back to the things that hurt me.
I'm sorry I don't think about the consequences.
I'm sorry, for feeling like this.

Thank you so much for the words. Thank you for standing up fo…

This Town

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Assalamualaikum

Funny how someone you barely know,
Could actually make you feel at ease with their presence.

I don't even know you well,
But I know what to call you.

I know that you have pretty fingers,
And such a wide beautiful smile, showing your teeth.
I know the sound of your voice and the way you laugh.

But I don't know where did you come from,
Your past, your current,
Your everything.

I don't even know who you are,
But you staying here,
Feels nice, and perfect.



Jelas

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Assalamualaikum

Rugi. Itu yang aku terfikir tadi.
Sebaik saja muka itu melintasi ruang fikiran,
Serasa senak dada, walau sudah lama berlalu.

Lama. Ya, seperti sudah terlalu lama.
Namun aku masih di takuk lama.

Mana lagi boleh dicari,
Orang seperti kau, sentiasa menggugah hati.
Baik manis mahupun masin, tawar dan pahit.
Serasa kau tidak boleh diganti.

Mana lagi kau di dunia,
Kalau bukan kau yang seorang itu.
Datanglah rupa serupa tanpa cela,
Tidak akan pernah sama.
Kau satu dalam seribu,
Walau hati retaknya lebih seribu.

Mana lagi boleh aku cari,
Yang tahu aku dan kebanyakan tentang aku,
Walau diberi masa yang singkat,
Semua apa yang kau teka sentiasa tepat,
Serasa kau lebih kenal aku dari setiap sudut dan lipat.

Mana lagi boleh aku celah,
Kau sendiri sudah kata pintunya telah diselak,
Rapat. Sungguh tiada ruang.

Mana lagi kita di sini,
Namun yang patah tumbuh, yang hilang berganti.



For You 2#

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Assalamualaikum

You are the best writer, my best muse.
My forever muse and I know you'll never go away.

The things I told you weren't enough to picture what was inside me,
But you would always know me so well you didn't even need extra.
It's like we're sharing the same heart, you swam through all the feelings,
Unsaid thoughts and the things I myself overlooked.

Of all the people I've taken for granted,
Now, I hope I'd never let you go to waste.

Know that I would always hide in you, cry myself out,
Even we're miles away from each other.
Know that I would always love the look in your eyes,
And how warmth your smile is,
And you'll always be my favourite home.

I really do, love you.



Thru These Tears

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Assalamualaikum

I hope you'd be vanished and become dust in my memories,
But live happily in my reality.

I hope I'd no longer see you in the crowd,
And see the look of a stranger in your eyes.

I hope I'd never need to hope for things when it comes to you anymore,
And I won't think about you anymore.



For You

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Assalamualaikum

I told myself to be cold,
Never wanted to break the ice,
With this, either trust or heart could be saved,
If I chose to be cold.

I told myself to keep everything within me, only,
Never allowed anyone to come close, this time,
I wouldn't need longer days to heal me,
If I chose to be cold, even if I didn't shine.

But then you came along, stood there with that smile.
Many smiled that way, but none was captivating,
Like you, today.

The way you made me giggle,
The crushed trust from the past was rekindled,
I forgot about the ongoing plan,
That soon would only lay on the sand,
Taken away into the sea, with that I knew it;
With everything you got, you melted the ice.

The heat of your sunshine was overwhelming,
You reached out to me in no time it's unpredictable,
Unexpected, and amusing.

From afar I noticed just how much of a beauty you are,
With that nails and slender fingers,
Your shyness and sometimes I could hear you laugh,
Unnoticed, but today I could feel it&…

T___T

Assalamualaikum

So right now, at this moment of my life,
I have finished watching all seasons of Haikyuu and Kuroko No Basket.
And, both of them are.. so amazing!

T_______________T

I don't really like sports,
But these animes are the only exception.
By watching them, I could actually learn a few things about volleyball and basket.

And these animes are much more than just about sports.
They taught you about the value of trust, friendship,
And how your foes could actually become your friends.
And how your opponents aren't actually bad.

No matter how hard you fight, how much you hate them for being so strong,
At the end of every game, you could actually learn many things from them.

I really love how the main team appreciates their opponents in every game.
It's, a good thing. Like, really good.

And the best thing is, the bond of the whole team.
How the captain plays his role so well,
How they trust one another,
And from both of these animes, I've learned that with trust, s…

Hey Sweetie

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Assalamualaikum

You have always been so beautiful,
Everyone knows that. Everyone is aware of that.
You have always been so perfect, Some would try to find your imperfections, even so, Your flaws are what make you who you are, up until now, And just now once again I was blown away by your lights. They were flawless.  The best kind of perfect for me.  It's you.
Tell me more about you. I'd love to listen, hours become days, And as the time goes by, I no longer need to hope you'd remember me. 
Knowing you is sheer bliss. Alhamdulillah.

San Francisco

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Assalamualaikum

Having a break without you around felt weird,
You're late this time.

Months not seeing you,
But the next time we meet, the air will surely taste familiar.
It's like you've been there with me, all along.
It's like distance has never taken us away from us.

It flows naturally, whenever it's you.
It feels nice, and sweet, and I know it's you.

It has always been you for me,
Even though I never saw it coming.

That white scarf, that young look of yours,
That smile and laugh,
That everything of you, I'd like to savour every bit of it.

I guess, I'm just missing you a little too much.



You

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Assalamualaikum

I bet you won't understand it when I say 'I miss you',
But I think you could make sense when I tell you this-

I think of you everyday,
And every time you come into my mind, it's hard for me to accept that you could only be there.
Just in my mind. Just in my heart.
You're anywhere around me, but not in this reality.

I talk about you almost every day,
And every time my voice cracks to utter your name, it saddens me to know that I could only say your name out loud, but you won't be here any time soon anymore.
You leave me, to miss everything about you with all my heart.

I know you won't understand if I tell you I miss you,
But I miss you. So much that my visions are blurred my tears are here,
To show you how much I've missed you since the day you're gone.

All the time I spent with you keeps on flashing back, like a whole movie in my mind.
I want to hold you, and never want to let go.
I want to keep you with me for forever.
I never thoug…

Never Grow Up

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Assalamualaikum

I like to go to bookstores,
I might get it from mom, or dad,
But I don't really know whether this actually runs in the blood.
Well, it doesn't matter, does it?

Being so young, still couldn't afford to buy fancy things for myself,
Books were my escape back then. I could only afford to pay for books.
But as it became a habit, buying books every time we went somewhere far from home,
I was told to have my own savings, to buy those books, which weren't actually books.
They were novels and comics.

So I started to starve myself at school..
Nah just kidding hahaha.
I started to save some money, for novels and comics.

As you grew up, you started to do the same thing.
Except the saving part; you used dad's money to buy those comics.

I like the fact that you also like to buy books.
I like it when you read. You seem smart and decent.

That's why I would never want to miss coming to pbakl, every freaking year,
I like to buy you misi comics, a lot of them, jus…

No Words

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Assalamualaikum

I was never a knight in shining armour,
Never wanted to be one,
But even so, it felt nice to be a help of someone,
I'd like to be there for you, even if I was nobody.

I was never a spotlight,
Didn't want one,
It wasn't your attention that I needed,
It was you to be safe and sound, always,
Whenever and wherever you are.

I didn't need you to look at my way,
It wasn't your time and care,
It was you to keep walking and getting up,
No matter what was ahead of you.

I told myself if I really did care because I wanted to,
Then everything should be okay.
Even a 'thank you' wouldn't be needed.

I wanted it to be sincere, yesterday, now, tomorrow and always.

I didn't want to tie you up,
I just wanted you to be fine.








Home is in Your Eyes

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Assalamualaikum

Weekends make me feel safe,
To know that you're going to be there, for me.

To know that you're taking a break from the hectic life,
And sit down next to me, telling me everything about you.
To know that you're now facing me,
Clearly, no longer have to dream about you.

To know that we're going to have late night talk,
Not worrying about waking up late the next morning,
Knowing that you're there, with that same sweet smile,
For me.

On weekends I won't feel lonely,
As you'll make time for me,
We'll go somewhere far, be home before midnight,
Looking at your tired eyes, but you still smile that sweet smile,
You'll never going to be less sweet.

Weekends,
Everybody's at home.


Ghost Of You

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Assalamualaikum

I waited for you, to come to me again.
Like how you used to do.

The years I'd been knowing you,
I never thought you would mean something to me as time went by.

We didn't talk much.
But when we did, I enjoyed telling you about me and asking you random things.
You'd answer, but somedays your tone didn't sound so good.
But I guess, you also liked us talking.

I remember back then you used to approach me and ask me questions.
Most of the time my mind went black, my hands temperature would drop drastically.
Somedays I saw where you were looking.
Somedays I pretended like I didn't care.

I waited for you, but you never came back.
Even in pieces, I waited for you every day.
Every time I unlocked my phone.
Every time your face popped out in my mind.
Every day, until it became weeks, and months,
And the next thing I knew; I stopped.

It wasn't tiring, but I guess that's just how it is.
Time moved for me and I started to walk again,
I started to let you …