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Showing posts from May, 2018

Conceptual Metaphor

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Assalamualaikum

It might be at that time you couldn't figure out yourself well,
You were twisted by your own emotions,
Welled up in your chest, you felt sick.

Those assumptions, were not just mere assumptions.
But they weren't really just thoughts I made blindly.

They, slowly, gradually, finally, became the truth of the day.
And I knew this would happen, eventually.

Don't tell me to turn away, I could never run away from this reality,
I liked to speak, so I'd like you to let me.

Right now you have figured out yourself,
If partially then soon you're gonna be whole again.
Turning back will never be a plan,
So it's okay.

It should be okay.
That's just the way it is.





Castaway

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Assalamualaikum

She said I needed to find myself,
Needed to define myself,
Had I lost who I was before?

'I don't know,'

Seemed like I didn't even know what exactly happened.

It was insane, my head felt like spinning.

Somedays we were good,
But most of the days we pretended we didn't know each other,
When our shoulders brushed in the hallway,
When our eyes almost met,
When we both knew we were there, wide awake.

When people were gone and the place was empty,
It felt like the end of the day was resonated with mixed things,
Even I couldn't describe a thing,
But one thing for sure, you're there. Just like always.

I wanted to wipe the slate clean,
I wanted to feel that fresh feeling again, coming to you and seeing you again,
But what had happened?




Hey

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Assalamualaikum

It took me to be in your shoes to really understand and accept,
Everything that had happened.
To be able to see clearly, of the things in front of me.

I know how it feels like,
To bear with yourself, when all you ever want to do is running away from everything.
From the memories and the scenes you think are just mistakes,
To be able to live and be yourself once again,
To mend your broken heart and bones.
To forget everything and anything,
That's related to you, and me.

If you choose it to be like this then, what else can I do?
It would be mean if I ask you to stay and accept the things as they are now.

My sorry is now meaningless.
It has always been so cheap since years ago.
I just want to make myself feel good, it's so selfish of me, I know.
But once again I am sorry.
I am really sorry.


You

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Assalamualaikum

Hey, how are you now?
How's life? How's your ramadhan?
I really hope you're doing well.
I bet you are.

I miss you, looking at masjid besi makes me miss you more.
Remember when we went to masjid shah alam?
We ate roti john after tarawih outside,
I didn't notice you took a picture of me,
And the dim light could never interrupt your beauty.
You shone brightly, still beautiful as ever.

I miss your sweet voice.
Sing me sign of the time once again,
I'm sorry I took your presence for granted.
Now we're apart, I could only recall your faces in my mind,
Hoping you're getting better,
And sometimes you think of me.

Hey,
I hope Allah will ease everything for you.
I hope you will heal soon.
And I know you will,
You will.

You're so strong, you've always been one.



Talk

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Assalamualaikum

Come here and I will take you to my favourite spot,
And I hope you'll like it too

Holding your hands while walking,
You know, I have always thought I have no social quota.
But these days sometimes facing people tires me out.
No, it's not the people. It's the feelings.
If only I could stop them for a while and feel nothing when words are breaking my bones.
But without feelings I couldn't feel you.

Come here and I will take you to anywhere you want to go,
With some money let's take trains and come back at midnight.
I will show you more arts and masterpieces,
And we're going to fill up my galleries.

Looking at you while talking,
You know, these days have been hard.
Sometimes something feels so wrong but I don't know what it is.
But maybe I know. As talking about it might be hurt, let's forget about this.

Come here and let's have shinjuku once again.
I really like cakes and sweet things, as much as you like those doughnuts.
I will buy yo…

High Hopes

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Assalamualaikum

I knew I was damaging myself even more,
I wanted to feel the pain until I couldn't feel a thing anymore,
But throughout this whole journey I learned that I wasn't bulletproof,
It was painful, my friends believed me.

But today would become the day where you're no longer in my life,
I said my goodbyes in tears watching you leave,
But we knew inside it was the best.

You were the ghost haunting me at nights,
But tonight I could finally have one real sleep without the lingering of your laughs.
If only I could stay, but it was actually if only I could be normal again.
Staying would mean dying for me, my friends believed me.

I was hoping for the upcoming days to see me becoming someone new,
Someone so fresh and I would start from zero, again.
Inshaallah.

You could always have my shoulders,
And cry all you want,
I would try to be there for you.
So tonight, it's okay to be fragile and I would still see you in my eyes.




A Little Pft

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Assalamualaikum

I told myself I need to get the essay done by today,
But even yesterday was today, but now it has already passed.

I ended up watching another dramas,
Scrolling youtube and discovering songs and many other bands.
I would stop when I feel so useless and everything I do seems like destroying myself.

Sitting in my room I felt the heat from the cement building,
For the past few days I felt the weather was really good, I was good,
But then I remembered this room doesn't have an aircond like the hotel room I lived in and left a few hours ago.
I don't usually let myself cry, because I know crying won't change a thing but sometimes,
Crying does the best when all I could feel are cracks of my own heart inside of me.

I thought about my brother whether he loves the Transcend mp3,
Because I told him Walkman is the best, but then it only has 4GB and I thought about him and his playlist might be needing more than that.
So I chose Transcend but if it were to be a Walkman w…

Crystal Snow

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Assalamualaikum

I would be walking on the road we used to share,
You, and me by your side.
With your trainers, and my slip-on.

I would go to the shop we used to browse,
You, asking my opinions even though I was tasteless in fashion.
With that one firm faith, always believed in me and accepting my sayings.

I would choose to have my meals at the one we used to go,
You, with just light menu, and me with mine.
I didn't have a proper meal in the morning, and I bet you're also the same.
But you might just love light meals like that.

I would run my feet on the platform I used to see you there,
You, with that one sad look.
Me, with overflowing thoughts and questions I kept safe in my mind.

I would be remembering the fun moments we shared,
You, and me laughing by your side.
My laugh had always sounded so true and sincere with you.
And I truly had so much fun and good times with you.
You filled in the space in me, completing a huge part of me,
Breathing in life, and meant everything to …

One Ok Rock - Yes I am

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Assalamualaikum

It feels like only yesterday when I told you to meet me once again, at 19.
But now we are one year late.
I bet you don't even remember about this whole plan.

We told ourselves we're gonna have some money,
Rent a vast place with great food and people around,
Just for one day.
Did we talk about part time jobs? Until today I still have the urge to be a cashier at 7-Eleven and not wanting to give people any Dunhill or Marlboro when they ask me to.
And buy myself some comics and read them when no one comes in.

I've always liked to have you around me.
To sometimes laugh at your jokes even when they aren't so funny.
And to be irritated by your annoying acts and bizarre looks.

You look like Mad Hatter sometimes.
You behave like him, but you have always amazed me with your thoughts and sayings,
Sometimes you can be so serious and immersed in whatever we're talking about.

Through your instagram and snapchat I can see you're doing fine.
It's nice to kn…

Midnight

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Assalamualaikum

"You're not acting normal, you're faking normal,"

Once again you caught me red handed.
The things you said were all true.
And because they were perfectly perceived,
Because they were the truth,
My bones felt like breaking.

You called me a fool,
And honestly every night I felt the same.
I could never blame you for those words,
Because they were all true.
And I knew it all along so it's okay.

Just give me some more time.
No matter how many times I said the same,
Just give me some more time.
I will make you happy.
Of the me who can finally see clearer.
Who can finally think properly.
Who is finally,
Normal.