Showing posts from December, 2015

Brand New


Well rn Im breathing in our kuliah room,
Hey Im in UPM Serdang

Being far from our beloved is really tough
Extra hard for me to handle my very own self

Dying a little,each and everyday
Only inside me know Im rotting all alone

The silence is so loud
And Im missing every single thing about noise
About your laughs and screams
The joy in smiles
The warmth ambience

I have them here
And most of all
I do have Allah with me



Aku mungkin akan mulakan sesuatu yang baru
Yang mana,mungkin mengujakan .
Dan ada juga bahagian yang merunsingkan

Doakan aku



Alhamdulillah !

I've just finished reading Ao Haru Ride
I guess I'm so obsessed with this manga hahahahaha

This story is kind of Siti Rosmizah's
The feelings that were shaking my whole world,
Were all the same . mann seriously ni SR verse Jepun ke 

However .
Yeah bro finally,Kou and Yoshioka could be together jyeahh !

I know,
I'm sorry for Touma,
Yeah he is a kind guy,and treasures Yoshioka a lot
But .
Kou is the first one who found her
Kou is the first one who fell for her
Kou has never stopped loving her
You hear that Touma ?!

(tetibe je wahahahaha)

Me (draft)


I could easily get myself drowned .
In anything . by anything

I could easily put myself in those stories I read
And when it is the end of the page,
My chest aches
I know it's crazy but,I would miss all of the characters in 'em

It would happen for days

And if there's a death in one of the stories,
It is much more painful for me
I would cry myself out (taklah parah sangat :p)
And would be wondering for days
Crazy,huh ?

Nahh . not really

That's me myself

Watching movies and dramas and anime,
Is . tougher
I would drive myself out of the road,
Thinking about those issues happening in 'em
It's hard for me to swallow those things
And when it comes to the end,
The feel of losing something,strikes me in the chest

This is just a part of me
That you . maybe want to know huh



Allahummasolli 'ala,sayyidina muhammad

For the man who had fought for Islam
For the man who had cried for us
For the man who had given his life for the sake of Islam,
For the sake of all of us,

Sanah Helway,Ya Rasulullah,Ya Habiballah .

We're so sorry for everything
And thank you so much .
For everything

Ao Haru Ride


Yoshioka Futaba is right .
When you fall for someone,you will notice every,
Single . Thing . About him/her

Just like herself
She knows exactly what Kou's neck looks like
Even though they haven't met for years but still,
She recognizes him .

He is taller
His hair has grown flawlessly
But still,he got the same eyes and look

Sniffing his neck and collar is her favourite habit
And Kou notices it,like,really

She drives herself crazy

Kou likes the scent of her hair
When the train moves,it brings in the harsh air and wind
Blowing her maroon + brown coloured hair

Her hears beats faster than ever

She decides to buy another shampoo,which is more expensive
So when Kou smells it,he would like her even more

But Kou acts so cold
But she never gives up

He still remember her face when she ran towards him when they were younger
And the same face she wears,when she's trying to make him open up to their friends

Kou never confesses,neither Yoshioka too
But I know .

Each time s…

An Old Friend


I bet your parents asked about me
Since we hadn't met for months

Since my shadow was no longer there
Since my name hadn't slipped out of your mouth for months

Since we both were playing nonchalant
Since we both didn't care about each other

We had no fight
But the ambience between us was polluted
Tell me why .

Might be it's my fault
I was the one who kept hiding

But why didn't you try to reach out for me ?

I saw no you
Neither in the rain nor in the sunlight

Allah .
Please do help us,
To keep this ukhwah till our own last breath



Yeah it still hurts
But .
I'm fine

You can still laugh and play
All that you got in your mind,is only about playing .
Eyes open,then you would start to play
You would make up plans with your friends
Someday you're going to be a Superman
And there are days which hold you as a bad man

You're still too young .

Then slowly,life will teach you .

It will make you see many things in this worldly life
You thought there are only nice people around you,
But then even your best friend could kill you easily .

You will know how it feels like,
When people you love don't love you back
When people you love sommer leave you behind
When people you trust treat you like a paper doll

You will know how it feels like,
To satisfy people around you with your blood and sweats
To work extremely hard,to achieve some goals in life

You will know how it feels like,
When people smile at you with sincerity
When people you barely know help you when you're dying

You will .


Blue Spring Ride


Then I realized,
That I depended on you so much .

You .

Remember when we were 13,
It was the beautiful month ; Ramadan
I used to wake up late,so the chance to have some meals downstairs,
Was only 1%
Then without thinking much,I went to see you next door
You were up,also . late .
I looked at you
It wasn't like I had no food of my own,but your love pulled me,
And you gave me some of your cereals
I ate 'em . and I do remember,the lights weren't shining bright .

Thank you :)

I used to leave you behind
Laughing without you beside me
But when those tears came running down on my cheeks,
I would look up for you

You .

Remember when we were 14,
I guess you were wearing a white uniform
You told us about your feelings towards that one guy
Then you cried . haha you just did
We were panicked ; didn't know what to do
And we did laugh , all of us . not excluding you babe

Remember when we were 16,
I was your little kid . I was your baby . I was your small creature .

A Day


Thanks Allah,
For another chance to live :)

Just like the other entry of mine,
Hey Mr and Mrs
Thank you for that child of yours
I don't know why,
But I notice that tall figure
I notice that slender fingers

I'm wishing you a happy ending of 2015
Maybe after this,the chances for us to bump into each other,
Are slim .
But that's okay
Redundant,I say . 'cause there are many more to meet
And everything could change,just in a split of second

Know that you are a colour in my life
Sometimes you could be white
And sometimes you could be black
But most of the time which has passed,
You were my favorite ; blue .



Satu hari nanti,
Kalau kau rindukan aku
Khabarkan saja pada angin yang sedang berderu itu
Apabila aku disapa olehnya,
Tahulah aku . itu nada rindu kau pada aku

Satu hari nanti,
Apabila kau turut pergi demi masa depan,
Khabarkanlah pada memori lalu ; memori kau dan aku,
Supaya tinggal,dan tidak berganjak . usah pergi
Mungkin aku tiada tahu . itu nada ingatan kau pada kita

Satu hari nanti,
Apabila kita sibuk dengan masa dan isu kehidupan,
Sampai tiada terlayan rasa ingin bertembung pandangan .
Maka moga sebelum kita berehat,kau teringatkan aku
Dan aku juga teringatkan kau .

Satu hari aku bimbang
Kalau aku terlepas pegangan tali yang membawa aku pada sarang hati kau
Namun ada yang bisik,

Kalau ukhwah ini kerana Allah,
Pasti Dia akan jaga .

Satu hari nanti,
Apabila jasad aku kaku
Mungkin kau tak akan pernah tahu .
Macam mana sayangnya aku pada kau,wahai .

Kenanglah kembali apa yang kita pernah ada dan lalui
Sama ada kau akan menangis atau tersenyum,terpulang .


I don't know


Three words,that would forever describe my feelings,to you ;
I miss you

I remember,your dad said
Friends are friends,and sometimes they can be too close
But then,there is a time where they would act like they're strangers
I smiled on that day,thinking that it would be impossible for both of us

Pft - it's happening

I don't know why
But one day,everything seemed fine,without you
The urge and whispers that used to enshroud me,to reach out for you,
Suddenly were gone .
And I felt nothing

I'm so sorry
You used to be my everything
But sometimes I was curious of you,
Did I mean so much to you back then,
Just like you meant everything to me ?
Can you give me a hint ?

Did you love me ?


Old Friend


I used to think about you
Every where and every time
Because it was so hard for me to forget you,
And everything that we had carved

I used to fail to fight the urge to see you
That was why when the holiday came,
We would make up plans
And I was thinking about all of the movies you might have

You used to say my name and think about me
And might be you used to miss me
You used to post about me and you told the world you loved me haha
I knew it could never be serious,as long as it was you

Time flew so fast we didn't even realize,
We were drifting apart .
But still,I thought about you sometimes
I told 'em about you and the way you behaved
You were so funny and sometimes bizarre
And you,still,have the breathtaking look
With your black skinny jeans

Now it has been a long time
Hey,have you ever thought about me,even once in 2015 ?

My Pie


If you are right in front of me,
I guess I would pull you,into the centre of me
And hug you tight

"Shh,it's okay,"

Don't be sad
La takhaf wa la tahzan,innallahamaana

I bet this is the first time you're experiencing something like this
And that person has no idea what he has done to you
It's okay .
He's not at fault

I'm not good at giving talks,but .

Hey .
This is not you
The one that I ever want to be
Free from all of those things and feelings
But it's okay .
You have the right to be like this

It's hard to stop thinking about it
Once we've stepped into it,
It takes everything in us,to set us free .
Like the way we used to be .

But then when it hurts too much
Don't ever forget that Allah is always there for us

His love is extremely deep
The deepest love ever in this whole wide galaxy
In this worldly life .

Pray to Allah so He will help you to get through this
Pray to Allah so that you could help yourself
Pray to Allah,as…



Aku sudah tidak mahu kisah,
Atau ambil pusing
Cuma,kadang-kadang tersenyum kecil apabila melihat perkembangan kau
Sudah besar kau sekarang ya
Orang Perlis cakap besar tagun

Biarlah semua yang dah berlaku antara udara di celah-celah hembusan nafas kita,
Menjadi sebuah kisah silam .
Yang mana mungkin kau ingin buang ke laut,
Yang mana mungkin akan selalu aku kenang .

Eh bukan .
Bukan aku masih terperuk dalam kolam rasa yang sama
Aku baik-baik saja

Apa yang dah terjadi merupakan satu pengalaman buat aku
Pengalaman yang tersangatlah lain
Satu pengalaman ;
Senak abdomen aku tahan debaran
Terketar mulut aku berkata
Serasa lemah seluruh badan

Itu semua memang susah nak lupa
Itulah kali pertama,
Aku menjadi seperti yang sedemikian .

Tidak mengapa,
Sudah lama kita mengundur diri
Janganlah cari aku lepas ni :)



There were some other times in my life
When I would sit down,and rub both of my eyes
Those tears were forming a river,flowing on my chin
Dropping,like there was no end of it

I told myself I missed them so much

Then I played back those images in my brain
With Allah's power,
I could see all of them vividly,just .
So clear .
I could see those colorful uniforms
Those faces and eyes
The way they looked at others
The way they communicated
Those laughs and jokes
Rainbows and storms .

Just .
There were too much for me,to handle in my mind

And those mixed feelings

I know I can't have those things in my future
Because forever it will remain like this
The school is over .
But I couldn't get over it

It's only a building
Students do come and soon they will have to leave

But I did create memories in it
I did laugh and cry
I made friends
I had 'em in my life

Miss them every second in my life
Soon I could have myself to move on
I would meet some more people
I would…



I didn't have the guts to talk to you
Until now

But I guess you should know this ;
You really know how to comfort me :)
Even we only had met for a few days,but a little of you could make me smile
I was eager to write about you,since last year

You're so nice,to all of us
Thank you so much for your willing,
To give us yourself,in 2014 .
You're an expert,and we did believe in you
It's okay if we only got Silver Medal,but whatever it's,
Alhamdulillah .

I'm sorry,I could be totally bizarre and awkward sometimes

There were days that I talked to you like I never wanted it to end
But then when tomorrow came,
I seemed so arrogant and was playing truant
I acted like you were a stranger

But honestly,
I never wanted it to end
I really liked to talk to you back then
We share the same interests ; 5SOS,Adventure Time
And once again,thank you
For your stories and jokes
Thank you for your willing,to have me as a friend
Even though I'm no one nice


Blink - 182 1#


Aku asyik fikir soal ni dari hari itu lagi
Rasa-rasanya sebelum kau berangkat pergi

Apabila malam,sudahlah aku tak tahu menunggang kuda bermotor itu
Seriau dibuatnya bila fikir

Sekarang cakaplah,
Macam mana aku nak pergi Tarawikh,
Dah kau berpijak di benua yang lain




I really want to say this ;
You're so damn beautiful when you smile
Your face is just so mesmerizing,breathtaking
The very first time I saw you,all of me admitted that,

"Man,she's so gorgeous,"

I just can't take my eyes off you

I heard that you wanted to know more about me
But then when we bumped into each other,
No word was uttered by each of us
I just could only admire you,from afar

Then you came into my life

You are just so bizarre it tickles me all the time :)
And you're one of a kind

I'm sorry but there were times when you kicked my butt with your acts
It was very painful

But then in SGS .
Allah has opened my eyes ; I need ya

You cared for me
When I was down and sick,you were there
Sitting beside me,was willing to wait for me

Hey there my pie,
Thank you so much for your love and care
Thank you so much for your willing to be my friend
Even though I'm no good
I bring you no benefits I'm truly sorry

Thank you
And sor…

Hai 3#


I couldn't sleep last night
Yeah it was my fault,
But nah nvm

I looked at my right,and then closed my eyes,tight
Because I missed the moment when I turned to my side,
I would see you,smiling .
Or sleeping

Do you miss me ?
The way I've been missing you ?

I was in the car and I saw you,
Smiling and laughing
In the box of my own memories

I never want to forget you
Because you are one of the best things,
That I found in this dunya

Thank You


I know I can never thank you enough
But I will always ask Allah to always bless you
To always forgive you
Aamiin :)

Like others,
You are the true hero
And you're my first hero

I don't have all the memories with you back then when I was small,
But I do remember your young face and figure
I'm sorry,but when I was young,I didn't very fond of you hehe
I didn't know why but I doubted you hehe
It might be because I was too young
To think of something good
To value your love towards all of us
I couldn't think straight I'm so sorry

As I grew up,
I started to realize that you would always try your best
To make sure that all of us could live a good life
Allahurabbi .

As I grew up
I started to see that you would always care for us
No matter how hard the ordeal was,
You would fight for us

Hey . Thank you so much
For your ever lasting love
For all of your sacrifices
For taking care of all of us
For running for us
For crying,for us
For everything,just to …

Other Half



I guess,I could never leave you behind
Even though we are going to be busy
Do pray that,
This beautiful ukhwah would stay,lillahitaala

I never thought you would mean so much to me

Sometimes you do hurt me with your words
And I believe that I've stabbed you so many times with my own thoughts and stories
And my own dispositions

The sky isn't always azure and blue in colour,is it ?

I do believe that we need raindrops and lightnings
So that when you're scared,you can always hold me tight
And I would never let you go


Hujan itu rahmat

Short Story

"Hey Reiji,"

She turned her back,to face me

I beamed

"Good luck,"

Those words had made her carve me a sweet smile
She nodded


I gave a pat on her head
She was still crying


She tried to answer,but she herself was drowned in her tears

I put my jacket on her slender body
So that she wouldn't tremble in coldness
It was winter
And her heart was broken into pieces

"I could never find a guy,,who would..,accept me,"
"The way I am .. "

I smiled

I took her hand,and put it on my cheek

"Do you feel the heat ?"

She nodded

"Do you feel its warmth ?"

She nodded

"Like it ?"

"Yeah,of course,"

"Do you know who is this one person,who knows all of your favorite songs ?"

She shook her head ; didn't know

"Do you know who is it,who knows your favorite colour ?"
"Your favourite food ?"
"Your mood ?"
"Your smiles and tears ?"
"Your scent ?&q…

Hey There


It's hard
To make the people around us feel happy
And to freeze the happiness,around 'em
So that they wouldn't feel vice versa

It's hard
To kill our own soul,just for 'em

But still,
Make people smile
Is verily a noble deed
We will get pahala :)

Lessen the burdens on their shoulders
Is also a noble thing to be done
We will get pahala,

Obey our parents
Talk to them nicely
Smile .
Make their hearts flatter with your sincere love
Oh Allah 

How I wish we could do those,
All the time


I smiled Because you respected me Even though I was nowhere near you
Hey thank you
For acknowledging my presence  As your wings
Thank you
For telling him to wait for him
As you needed to ask my opinion first Before jumping into any conclusion



I just don't easily write about people

And I like to write about 'em

I've read your long letter
It's okay,those words were all nice to me
I was fine . Perfectly fine

I'm truly sorry . For what I've done to you

I know I wasn't being a good friend back then

Sometimes it felt like stabbing you was the only way,
To curb my temper .
But ya know,sabr is the most beauteous road ever to take
I told myself to calm down

I cried so many times because of you .
Because I felt you didn't care about me
Because I didn't like you being with those guys
Because you didn't tell me a single thing about 'em

Because you changed . And I hated it

After all of those hardships and ordeals,
I got you back . I didn't how and when,but what I knew was,
I loved you more than I ever did

We were classmates
And we were closer
You meant the world to me
I knew I had been counting on you since the first day and I'm sorry
For putting you through those dirt…



I thank Allah
For giving me you

With your beady eyes and sweet smile
You liked to talk to me
And I really liked to listen to your every word

When the moon showed up
The lights were gone in our room
You looked at me
And what else could I do,other than replying your stare ?

We would talk
Until my eyes were closed
Talked about anything
And you made my days

It hurt me when you gave me no smile
It hurt me when you were acting nonchalant

I cried when the pain hit me louder than the silence did
I cried when everything went so wrong

Thank you so much,
For lending me your ears
For hearing my stories and memories
For liking 'em the way I did

For your chocolates and biscuits
'cause you never liked Lexus and its friends

I never blamed you for it
But sometimes I did wonder
I did think about your feelings

"I would never fall,"

And you smiled

We can never be so sure of our own feelings
They do change,
Just like us :)



Are just like the weather

Hard to predict

Can change easily

From the start,I could never fathom you
But I guess .
Sometimes I could see your colours

I thought everything was fine between us
But then .
Now it seems like everything has changed
And you never tell

You just never .

To be honest,your words break me
You mean nothing,and it tears me apart
I don't know why but those epithelium cells are very
Very thin .

You've touched it
And now I'm bleeding

A Dream


You know I had a dream last night
I saw you,and the others
I remember you,
And that's because I've missed you

There,I didn't even know where we were goin'
I tried to ask but something happened
Then you sommer left

You left me

But it seemed like
I understood your intention well

It has been like that,
As all of us were so busy with our lives

I just want to meet you once again
And the others
Because the silence is getting louder,isn't it ?

Really ?
May this ukhwah stay because of Allah :)



Tak pernah lagi aku berada dalam suasana sebegitu ;
Kelompok lelaki begitu kecil
Dalam fikiran,
Ya inilah masanya kaum yang tertindas bangkit
Bahagian tengah yang senantiasa sejuk dan beku boleh diambil alih
Setelah sekian lama kami ditepi

Ya,Alhamdulillah . Kami berjaya memiliki kawasan tengah
Namun mereka berlima juga turut serta hmph lantaklah
Mereka jenis yang bagi aku,baik . Jadi,tiada masalah jika mereka sedikit bahagia . Heh
Kelas itu merupakan sebahagian hidup aku . Walau aku senyap,yelahkan buat apa bising bagai aku tetap wokeh .

Yang sedihnya sahabat baik aku tidak lagi menemani . Sudah tahun kedua,perpisahan itu amat perit
Tapi kami tetap baik-baik . mungkin . Tapi kau join juga lepas tu .

Kalau ditanya ; jika UKM dibom,apa kau akan rasa ? Sedih la kut,kerana aku tahu itu agak mustahil
Jika UKM dilanda ribut,apa kau akan rasa ? Tak menyempat nak rasa bagai,aku lari dulu hahaha .
Kerana aku fikir,itu juga agak mustahil .

Tapi semuanya berada dalam …



Like a ghoul
You are ugly
And sometimes I couldn't resist it,
So I tell myself that you are a ghoul

But you aren't .

And that's my problem

Like a mirror
My images are reflected in your eyes
I couldn't help it
Don't you know it is forbidden ?
Don't look at me

And that's my problem

You are not at fault
But please do feel guilty

You have gone too far
And I have fallen too hard

Short Story

"You left me in confusion for months,"

She always looked at me
Whenever I was nearby
It seemed like,she was stretching out her hand,
Towards me .
Just to reach me,from afar

Just,ugh .

She always waited for me
Whenever I was walking behind her
Stopped at a junction,turned her back

Our eyes met
Then she continued to walk

My chest started to act on the pressure
Whenever we bumped into each other
I didn't smile,I wanted her to start it first

But she didn't .

One day,my eyes caught her glimpse on me
I had no idea what to do,then she struck my heart
With a smile
She smiled me a sweet smile
A voice in my mind kept telling me that,
She was something in me

My friends told me to make a first move
Yeah as a guy,I should have been doing it

But then,

"Dave,have you not heard it?"
"What ?"
"She's someone else's.."

Huh ?

I replayed all of those memories
The times I had lost myself,in reality
Now I could heard those voices
Cheering her name with…



I need words
To utter these ;

It's sad,to think that
We could fight over the smallest thing
Even about what could chase our hunger away
About some small mistakes
About something that we thought,
We didn't need to tell each other about it

Don't forget that we are all humans
We make mistakes,
It's either we realize it or not

Don't forget that I breathe
Just like you do
That means we are the same
But the blood running in our veins and arteries and capillaries
Isn't the same
But yeah whatever we're still the same

Yeah I admit that I've failed to be a good one
I hurt you
In every way that I could
Thank you for reminding me,
That I was a loser back then,
An assasin in disguise

Now that I'm truly sorry

But it hurts me when you keep pressing my chest
With those words and thoughts
I know That I'm wrong
But I'm so sorry

I admit that sometimes I'm not being fair
I couldn't give you the best of me,as I was busy entertaining others




When I heard the Azan
Its waves were surrounding the cold ambience
How I missed the time,when I looked at you
Asking you to bring me to perform Tarawikh
And you just agreed,
Making me smile all the way

I know,
Maybe next year it would be hard for me
As you're no longer here

It's okay
I don't really need Beats
I need you to live
And move on
And try your very best

And I want to try my best,too

Indah Lelapku


Katanya sudah pindah
Tak pernah tersedar apabila aku melihat ruangan bawah mejanya,
Cuma ada habuk
Terus terbatuk tersedak aku

Biasanya ada saja di belah kanan
Tapi satu hari ruangan itu telah kosong
Sekosong perasaanku tika itu

Katanya sudah baik,sembuh
Cis bedebah mulut kata ya
Organ dalam berteriak,semua itu bohong belaka

Bohong ?
Ya kau cuma omong kosong
Kosong ?

Tidak .

Nyalaannya tetap ada

Satu hari kau menghilang
Jarang aku terserempak dengan bayang kau
Tapi bila tiba masanya
Mengapa kau begitu ?

Ciskekkkk haha

Since Forever


All praises to Allah :)

The larger it is ; my vision
The more I can see
The more I can feel

That you guys are my main cells
My main characters
My main voices

We are out of the road
One of us drives us out of the way
But I'm the mode of the data

I'm truly sorry

My dad once said,

"If you want to find true friends,then,this is the right time for you,"

When was it ?- the first time I stepped into the gate

They are many,
But you guys are the most amazing

Thank you,Allah
For these people ;

Err haha sorry aku takda gambar lain Anggaplah Luke itu aku,yang lain tu korang pilih sendiri :p

Well Hey


You made a come-back
Filling my heart with your quotes and sayings

My heart used to skip a beat
But yesterdays,
It showed me no response

I felt numb

Thank you for coming back
And for remembering me,
One little lass who meant something back then
It's okay now that I'm nothing

I'm good

Hey my friends like you,
When I tell them stories about my pasts
We went through those pages in my life
And we would always bump into your figure
That one good-looking lad

Sometimes I really want you stay in the past
But then I realize that,
People do come and go,
And they do come back

Once we get to know them
Each other,leaving traces in our lives
Then for forever,they would remain in our lives

Just like you .
You met me and filled me with many colours
Then I felt like I was broken
I wanted you to go,
But then you kept coming back
And you just did .

Then it made me think
Why not ?
You're still someone in me